LABOUR DAY; THE FIRST THREE HOURS

December the 9th. Ryan gives me a kiss as he leaves for school. I think to myself that he looks tired; he's stayed up too late studying for the finals he has today, and then woken up too early. I wish him luck on his exams and he tells me to call him and let him know how my Doctors appointment goes. Through bleary eyes I tell him that I will.

I roll myself out of bed and put on the lightest clothes I can find since I know they'll be weighing me at the clinic, though at this stage in the game this seems to be a little pointless. I grab a nutri-grain bar for breakfast telling myself i'll eat something more substantial after my appointment. I pull my hair back into a curly mess of a bun, and don't even think about my make-up. I just can't wait to get back home again so I can take a long nap. My mind had been whirring all night long making sleep almost impossible. I feel exhausted.

Mum was waiting for me downstairs, ready for our 8 am start to the day. She tells me that I should bring along my over night bag "Just in case." I know that she's right but I refuse to. At this point, I have given up hope of ever having the baby and can't bring myself to load the bag, since I'm convinced I'll just be carting it home again an hour later. We get into the car and head to the hospital where I am scheduled to have a routine check up. It's the 40 week appointment that I never thought I'd have, since I was sure the baby would have already arrived, but at 3 days over due, I no longer know what to expect.

We spend the car journey planning my 'please induce me now' speech. We really give it a lot of thought. My mum's leaving the country and she might not get to see her only grandchild. My husband is in the middle of his finals and it would really be a stress reliever if we could schedule an induction. Did I mention that my Mum lives on a different continent? I figure that I can throw in some tears and they'll be putty in my hands.

I'm called back and the nurse measures my weight and then sits me down to take my blood pressure. She is training a new nurse, so this takes longer than usual. Hmmm, blood pressure is high. Something/95. I'm sure the elevated numbers are closely related to me seeing how much I weigh, and contemplate this as the nurses take my blood pressure for a second time. The numbers have come down, the 95 is now 89, and I am now utterly convinced that my theory is correct.

Now it is the turn of the Midwife. She re-takes my blood pressure, which is steadfast at 89. She offers to strip my membranes, and not entirely sure what this means I excitedly tell her to go right ahead. If it might help the baby arrive sooner, I'm all for it. She asks me if I have any questions , and I'm all set to give her my little speech, when she tells me that she's sending me up to labor and delivery. My blood pressure concerns her, and she wants to have my fluid levels checked. "You won't be going home unless everything is absolutely perfect," she says. "Get ready, you might be having a baby today."

My stomach leaps with excitement. I might be having a baby today. I try to keep the grin that is taking over my face at bay. Wow, I might be having my baby today. I walk out into the waiting room where my Mum is waiting for me.

"Well?" she asks.

I tell her that they're sending me up to labor and delivery for some checks. I try and tone down my excitement and assure her that everything will be fine and I will no doubt be on my way home again within half an hour. As I am saying the words I am hoping that they're not true. I pick up my chart from the receptionist and feeling very official, we make our way upstairs.

"I told you we should have brought your over night bag," she jokes. Please let her be right, I think.

Situated on a bed and dressed in a horrendous pink gown that is definitely not in my color wheel, I contemplate the fact that our little girl could be born today; after all of these months of waiting I could be holding her in my arms within hours. I always imagined that I'd be terrified at the thought of impending labor, but oddly I just feel excited. I have butterflies in my stomach and I have an overwhelming, somewhat ridiculous desire to squeal aloud, like one of those annoying girls who always seem to be sitting behind me on a roller coaster.

My blood pressure is taken once again and it remains in the safe zone, back down in the eighties. My heart sinks, and while I'm relieved to know that there's nothing wrong with me, I can't help but be disappointed that we probably will be making the drive home again after all. A Midwife arrives, wheeling in with her an ultrasound machine. The familiar gel is placed on my belly and she proceeds with the ultrasound. We hear the baby's heartbeat, as we watch it pumping on the screen, strong and slower than it was just as few months ago. The Midwife points out her tiny features to us, and whilst my mother and I look on in awe, she goes about measuring fluid pockets.

She talks aloud, though she doesn't seem to be directing her speech at anyone in particular. "Hmmm, no that won't work. " She moves her hand to a new area. "Well, thats all cord." Another quadrant, " No, full of cord again." She ends up back where she started and then proceeds to tell us what we've already figured out. "There's not enough fluid left around the baby so we're going to need to induce you. You get to stay here today."

My heart is racing, my stomach is leaping into my throat. Mum and I turn to each other with giant grins on our faces; I'm not sure who is more relieved. I am thinking one thousand different thoughts of how I can't wait to hold my baby girl, how I can't wait to look into her eyes, how I can't wait to teach her and love her...but as I look at my own mother and realize that twenty five years ago she was thinking those same precious thoughts as she anticipated my arrival, all I can think of to say is, "I wish I'd had a bigger breakfast."